Tammy McClelland

This week started out with some very chaotic activity but by the end of the week everything was been calm and peaceful. I guess those are two odd words to use in the midst of this but it is true. There have been no more seizures. The new medication plan seems to be working and for that we are glad. The Hospice doctor was in on Wednesday. By then, he felt that Travis had stabilized and I agreed. The nurse was here on Friday and everything was about the same. Since the seizures, Travis seems to have a harder time communicating. I don’t think this is related to the seizure but more an energy factor. Whether it is the energy it takes to process a question and then not only think up the response but then communicate or just the energy to communicate, either way, communication with Travis has dropped off dramatically. Not only verbally, but head shaking or even blinking is not really even being used by Travis. So with communication dropping off, it has made my job a little more difficult. Trying to read signs and things that might give me indications as to pain. I noticed on Wednesday that Travis seemed to be restless, just moving around a lot. He was not moaning or grimacing, just moving more than usual. At first I didn’t think much of it. Then I noticed he was rubbing his head a lot. Again, no other signs just holding or rubbing his head. By Friday morning, I wondered maybe if Travis was experiencing maybe a low level of pain or discomfort thus causing the restlessness or head holding. When the nurse came, we discussed it and decided that next time I viewed those signs, I would give him pain medicine and see what happens. That decision seems to have resolved the situation, so apparently there was some low level pain or discomfort that he was experiencing. After the pain medicine kicks in, Travis calms right down. Travis is still not eating but that started before the seizures so that is not new. He is able to swallow small pills and water if he is awake. He has been sleeping quite a bit more than before the seizures but not anymore than he was when he would be in a decline. The children were able to hang out with some friends this week and I think that was good for them after the emotional start to the week. An opportunity to just be kids and live life. My biggest concern now is that our youngest child’s birthday is in 3 days. Not like I have had any control over anything that has happened so far but I have had to give this to God just like everything else. All of the children are aware of the circumstances and that Travis’ passing maybe days or weeks away. We just have no way of knowing. I have especially talked to her though, about her feelings about her birthday and what her desires are. It just gives me a way to pray. She really wants her dad to be here to see her turn 11. My prayer is not only for that but also that no matter when Travis passes, that God is able to handle her heart in such a way that her birthday will always be joyful and not painful in the years to come.